Mom's love for us - Food

I visit josh's grandma home twice a week. 

One day, my mom make a roasted fish. 
When eating time come, conversation happen like this:


Mom: come and eat, I buy a fresh fish from the market, so I decide to roast it for josh.


Me: Thanks mom, ok, I will eat it. Josh can only eat half of the fish. Mom take the rest okay.


There were 2 fish on the plate.


Mom: no, you eat it. Beside, your brother will eat it later on. Mom can have the rice with other food (last night cook).


On the night, my bro came home, but he has bring his own food. The rest of fish untouched.
My mom still keep it on the refrigerator for tomorrow morning, cause she believe this good quality of fish shall be eaten by her child or her grandson.
These kind of thing not happen once in a while, but all the time.


Today morning, I see my mom cook a fried rice with meat ball (own made),"lap coi",egg, and pees, other veggie.
We always love this. My sister n bro bring it to office.
Still left lot enough for 2 stomachs. But instead of eating it, my mom just give it to me and Josh.
She says: I'm full. I eat the porridge with soup.
I know she made porridge from yesterday rice that left so much. And may be we will not enjoy to eat it.

I never understand why n why my mommy seem so naturally sacrifice for her children.
I can disappointed with my bro and sis and sometime not easily forgive. But my mommy, even she disappointed, but she can forgive in a click.


Then when the day I became a mommy, I got it! that sacrifice feeling was really came naturally when I first seeing Josh out of womb and I hold him on my arm.


Now I look like my mom *grin*.
I try to serve a good quality food for Josh.
I like to eat yogurt, but now, I prefer to buy yogurt for Josh than for my self. Consideration: Import yogurt price in here was still expensive. I compare with singapore supermarket last August for the same brand, the price here was 30percent higher. Buying for two people (me and josh) really cost us.
Yet, Josh sometime refuse to eat what I have try hard to made, even when I think that I have offer the best part of my food for him.


At the end, I might say, may be today n may be tomorrow or may be the next next year, josh will never understand what and why I do right now.
But I can't just abandon this natural feeling which I believe it's given. 
It's also a lifetime learning to snip a little bit of feeling when God let His Son sacrifice for us in the Calvary.
I believe when God trusted us a child, He also grant us power and comfort day to day for raising and nurturing our child.
So when I feel exhausted, when I have so much drain moment, I keep in mind the providence of God, keep in mind that my mom has going through this phase and the day surely pass, just enjoy and give thanks to what I still have now and focusing on the final aim.


Love you mommy and love you Josh.